The team has gathered for another meeting, and so far, there is a lot of talking, but not much listening. Rather than having an open dialogue where opinions are welcomed, it feels more like a series of opening statements in a courtroom drama. Help your team avoid this outcome by first understanding why we fall into the trap of using controlling language, and how it puts us into a protectionist mindset. In this Project Bite, you’ll learn the importance of developing new habits to “train our brains” and become more intentional in how much we listen versus how much we speak. I explain a style of questioning called appreciative inquiry and how it can foster a deeper, more generative kind of conversation, at work or home. Lastly, I show how you can instantly upgrade the conversations you have with yourself so you can send more positive, intentional messages to your brain’s operating system, all based on the words and phrases you use. Getting conversations on the right track can mean the difference between a long-running monologue that leaves everyone disengaged, and conversations that are energizing, where everyone feels heard and valued. As a team leader, you can work less hard and have more impact once you loosen your grip on controlling the dialogue and help the team generate new ideas and share the workload through imaginative questions and generative thinking.